A Safety Razor review

Although I'm sure we all enjoy spending $30 on a 8 pack of razor cartridge refills, there are less expensive options. My friend suggested I use a safety razor; she used one on her legs, and it was truly orgasmic (not really, but I thought I'd punch it up a bit). Now I'm sure we've all heard horror stories from our parents and their first times using a safety razor. I was afraid. I mean, it looks kind of scary because it's a razor blade screwed onto the end of a metal stick (of course why one blade looks scary and three, four, or even five blades coming at you doesn't, I'll never know). But in the end, I decided to give it a try.

Now, this post isn't going to be about how to shave with a safety razor, because there are many tutorials out there for that, my favorite being art of manliness . This is just my review of safety razor use, how I shave (before and after the safety razor), and a few pointers.

To start off with the big question: How much does it cost? A hell of alot less than you'd think. Art of Manliness says a new razor would be about $40. Not so. I bought mine at Sally Beauty Supply for $8, and my friend bought hers off of Amazon for about the same price. Then the razor blades themselves? Again at Sally's I got 20 for $4. I was using a Mach 3 razor before, and to get those cartridges, you have to give them your first born baby. I will also check on Amazon, because apparently you can get 100 for $5, but since I was already at Sally's, I just got what they had.

And now, the shave. It wasn't orgasmic. It wasn't irritation free like it was for my friend. It didn't shave any closer than my Mach 3. But it wasn't any worse either. So less money for the same results spells a winner for me. I did find it easier than shaving with the Mach 3, though. For one, there's only one blade, so it's not constantly getting clogged with hair and stuff because there's nothing for it to get clogged between. So the shave actually goes faster. The article I linked above may make some things seem tricky. It's not too difficult to not apply pressure, for one. If you play a violin (or similar), hold it as you would a bow. Just kind of hold it in the middle rather lightly, and let gravity shave you. As for the angle thing, when you see the razor and have on in your hand, getting the whole correct angle just kind of makes sense. It's not too difficult. I did have some trouble around my chin, but that's always the most difficult part.

So the products I use and how I shave. Well, besides the razor and technique, the rest stayed the same. I use a shaving soap... and I believe it's just called shaving soap. I get it at Walmart for about $1.50. One thing lasts forever. I keep it in a tiny pyrex with a rubber lid that seals tight. It came in a set I bought, and I was like, what am I going to do with this tiny pyrex dish, and it ended up being perfect for shaving soap. If you live in the deep south like me, you need a container that seals because roaches will eat the shit out of your shaving soap, and that is super gross when you see all the little holes in your soap and... detritus. I use a badger hair shaving brush with my soap. For me, this was free because it was a gift. A friend of mine bought it used off of ebay, just make sure you wash it first. As someone who used to sell shaving brushes, I highly recommend badger hair. One, never use synthetic. You will get frustrated with shaving and wonder why people say shaving brushes are so awesome. Seriously, I tried it. It's so tempting because a synthetic brush is less than $5. Boar hair brushes are the next price level up. They're not too bad, but ones I've had in the past are a bit rough, and hairs fall out, and they don't dry as quickly. Badger hair brushes are so nice. They create great lather, glide over the face, dry quickly, and last for-fucking-ever. seriously. They're more expensive, but you'll have them forever, so they're totally worth it.

I break some rules when it comes to shaving. One, I don't shave after a shower. The reason I don't do this is because I like to shower after I shave. Because I shave not only my face but my whole head, it's the easiest way to clean off, and it's so very soothing. I will rub a little tea tree oil in my hands to warm it up then rub that onto my face. Then I lather up with soap and shave. I shave first with the grain, then I break the rules by shaving against the grain. It just gives me a much closer shave. Then I feel around and shave where I feel bristles. My hair goes in every which direction, so it takes me a while. When rinsing my razor (and also to make the lather) I use cold water. You're supposed to use warm/hot water, but I find cold much more soothing. Then shower. Then I finish off with some witch hazel which I keep in a spray bottle. I spritz it all over and pat it in. I then go over it again with tea tree oil. Now for my #1 secret to stop razor bumps. When the witch hazel and oil dries, using a big brush (like what women would use for blush; I bought one at the Dollar Tree) brush on a bunch of corn starch. Now, go to bed. I realise some of you shave in the morning. I cannot. My neck gets so irritated that I need to give it a long rest after shaving or it looks like I have some disease.

Well, that's that. Looks like the safety razor is a keeper.

That is all,

The Notorious Dr. Dietrich.